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Vulnerability & Strength


The Silent Pressure on Men to ‘Hold It All Together’
There’s a pressure a lot of men carry.
Not always spoken about.
Not always obvious.
But it’s there.
Alan Stokes
3 days ago3 min read


Why Men Don’t Talk (And What Actually Helps Instead)
“Men just don’t talk.”
It’s something you hear a lot.
Said casually.
Repeated often.
Almost accepted as fact.
But when you look closer, it’s not quite true.
Because men do talk.
Just not always in the way people expect.
And not always in environments that make it easy.
Alan Stokes
Jun 34 min read


Breaking the Silence: Why Men in Plymouth Need to Talk
Ever noticed how men often dodge serious conversations about what’s really on their minds? Instead of opening up, many crack jokes or change the subject. It’s like there’s an unspoken rule: don’t show worry, just laugh it off. But why is that? Why do so many men find it easier to use humour as a shield rather than talk honestly about their worries?
Alan Stokes
May 214 min read


The Pressure of Being the Strong One
I think a lot of men quietly break under pressure long before anybody notices.
Not because they are weak.
But because they become too good at hiding it.
Over the last few years, I found myself carrying pressures from every direction at once.
Alan Stokes
May 214 min read


Why So Many Men Feel Lonely — Even When Life Looks Fine
On the surface, a lot of men are doing fine.
They’re working. Providing. Showing up for their families. Getting on with things.
From the outside, life looks steady—even successful.But underneath that, something else is going on.
A quiet kind of loneliness that doesn’t always look like loneliness.
Not isolation in the obvious sense. Not sitting alone with no one around.
But a lack of real connection.
A sense that something’s missing—without being able to fully explain what it
Alan Stokes
May 204 min read


Sometimes Life Beats the Hell Out of You
There were moments over the last couple of years where life brought me to my knees.
Not in a dramatic, cinematic way. Not all at once.
It happened slowly.
Quietly.
One difficult conversation at a time.
One sleepless night at a time.
One more responsibility.
One more fear.
One more loss.
One more thing to carry while pretending I was still coping.
From the outside, I probably looked functional.
I still worked.
Still spoke to people.
Still tried to lead.
Still showed up.
Alan Stokes
May 144 min read


How Do You Deal With Being Kept Away From Your Children When a Relationship Breaks Down?
UK guide for men when contact stops: how to stabilise, communicate, use mediation, and record efforts—while safeguarding your child’s wellbeing.
Alan Stokes
Dec 16, 20255 min read


When Men Lose Their Role or Identity: Finding Your Way Back
Struggling with divorce, redundancy or retirement? Learn how to handle role loss, manage emotions and rebuild a stronger sense of self.
Alan Stokes
Dec 2, 20254 min read


Why Rest Feels Harder Than Work (and What to Do About It)
If you’ve ever sat down to “switch off” and immediately felt guilty, restless, or itchy for your phone—this is for you. Many men tell me...
Alan Stokes
Nov 4, 20254 min read


Are You Lonely? The Feeling We Don’t Talk About
“Loneliness is the signal men rarely speak about. Discover why silence around loneliness harms wellbeing—and how honest connection can change everything.”
Alan Stokes
Oct 31, 20254 min read


The Mask of Perfection: Breaking Free from the Burden
“Why chasing ‘flawless’ keeps men stuck. Discover how putting down the perfect shield eases pressure, reduces isolation, and builds real strength through connection.”
Alan Stokes
Oct 24, 20254 min read


Embracing Vulnerability: A Path to Connection and Growth
Discover why vulnerability isn’t weakness, how avoidance harms relationships, and practical steps to build courage, honesty, and connection.
Alan Stokes
Oct 17, 20254 min read


The Mask of Perfection, the Fear of Vulnerability, and the Cost of Silence
Discover how perfectionism and silence hurt men’s wellbeing—and how vulnerability, honesty, and brotherhood build real strength.
Alan Stokes
Oct 3, 20254 min read


Riding the Rollercoaster of Starting Something New: My Journey with MoMENtum Men’s Group
“Starting MoMENtum Men’s Group has been a rollercoaster of excitement, fear, and hope. Discover the highs, lows, and lessons of building something that matters.”
Alan Stokes
Sep 20, 20254 min read
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